cempedak teluk!

and now Livejournal???

yes honey... i have a new account on livejournal . haish... i dunno why i open up a journal since i already got this damn blog!! i really like to see myself suffer isn't it? . well,,, what's done is done . i will try my best to update on both LJ and blogspot . LJ is just for fun . but blog is still my number 1 . just that my this blog will be my private blog . and LJ is my public account which i can post anything about music and stuff . because i already had friends here so i don't want to leave all my dearest readers ok? . it's christmas . so although i don't celebrate it . i wish those who celebrate and happy holiday for those who don't .

OMG! my holiday is almost over! aaaa!!! i don't want to go back to that godforsaken place . and to see that bitch . haish.... i really hate that annoying creature .

okay guys! bye2!

Owh My EFFFINNNGGG!!!

just got it from here . its GRIIIII!!!!!!!! . while GD was shooting the High High MV . Man...... I almost die of heart attack seeing this!!! . this is crazy!! . how come GD just do that in front of the public! . he do what?? . he's kissing Seungri apparently! . i don't know if he really kissed Seungri on the lips . i don't think that GD would do that in public . maybe GD actually kissed Seungri on the cheeks . but it looks like it's almost kissing on the lips?? . almost on the lips perhaps . but GD was intentionally kissed Seungri . Gawd! . if this is happening in front of the public,,,, then what happen when they were both alone????? . how this thing can be so much complicated??? . Seungri,,, is it just happened that you read "Unsolved Mysteries" because you and Jiyong are "Unsolved Mysteries" too?????? . Tell me,,,, Seungri-yah..............................



this is the gif on the "Crime Scene" . you can see screencaps here . where it shows the "Evidence" . and the video on High High MV BTS .



I can't sleeepp! . I seriously can't sleep right now . Hope someone can write a good fic on this "Maknae and Jiyong la Slut" . End .

Grism!!

ahh yes . my two love birds . i never forget about them . who?? . the most favourite k-pop couple of course . G-Ri . yup . this pics quite old though but i still want to post them in here . there's so many pics of Seungri and GD in the internet . you can find it . but i found two popular site about g-ri . one is a site for lots of g-ri pics here . and the other one is all about g-ri pair here . you can check out both site .

warning : if you guys don't like Gri . fine . but please don't hate me writing this okay ? . so i like gay couple . so what ? . you guys have problem with this, that's your own damn problem .


so, this is a few of my favourite pic of them . angst already in air~~~~ :DDD



they look so perfectly match together . ;)))



sleepy sleepy . when they still sharing bed and room long ago, GD always sleeping while hugging Seungri . aaaww . What you dream about there GD? ahahhah XDD



ahh sorry . the gif was small . nothing i can do about it . i fall in love with this . yah! Jiyong ah . i know you always want to kiss Maknae . Now, you can kiss him without even trying! . hahaha good job! . (while they're both acting in the parody virus) .



oww~~~~ . hugging Seungri in a middle of a wedding???? . Jiyong ah you must be really really that fall in love in Seungri ea??? huhuhuhu XDD



i tried to find other gifs but that one is only i can find in the time being . actually there's a lot of g-ri gifs and you can check it out on both site above . whenever i found the best gif and other pics of g-ri, i'll post it here ok

Current music : Here I Come - GDragon ft. Perry.

the man and the "in between" ;DD

wow.. i've been busy this few days guys! . why? . because of my man G-Dragon and Tabi with their new album that's why! . i'm so freaking excited! . when i see g-dragon, woww... my heart melt really . although with his ridiculous hair but his so damn beautiful man! . owh man... i just can't get enough of GD . XDD . more to suprise, Tabi with his platinum white hair . i was really shocked to see the old rapper looking like that . hahaha . not that he didn't look handsome though . he's still handsome . but for me i think his charisma was taken away by that hair . hahaha . i prefer Tabi with his old hair . yup2! . Charismatic Top . but the fact that both guys still looked awesome like that is still amazing .

The Leadah! G-dragon . and the old rapper Tabi .




At their World Premier . Yes . My man GD . if only Seungri was there with him . ;)))




Tabi! . GD said that although he's not as good looking as Top but his personality is good looking enough . but Top replied that it is true because of his ear which is good looking than GD's . You silly Bingu Top! . hahahahah XD . cute jeh ~~




GD! . why you think like that la?? . you definitely are way good looking than Top . always and will be! .

Current music : High High - Gdragon and Top

pretty damn sweet

how to say this in a simple way . you see this past few weeks i've been surfing on the internet like hell . everyday almost 12 hours a day . before this it was never really strong enough to make me do this but now i feel like wanted something on my blog . not just some babbling and thoughts about life you know . life is pretty big for us to figure, don't you think? . i think which is why i always have difficulties whenever i want to post something on my blog because i always take the big picture . i admit that my post sometimes talks about issues . lots of issues right? . yeah, you all read my blog and you get what i mean .

but now it's time for a new direction . i never share things that i like such us musics, artist, songs, movies, fashion or anything whereas thats what makes our life, right? . VITA DOLCE MODERATO . SWEET LIFE MODERATE . having a sweet life which is moderate or enough to make us happy . sweet life that is enough to just live for once . things we die for .

i hope you guys can accept my new transformation . because i don't want any of you to be suprise if incase i post something about some artist or some boy band or some gay couple . because all of this things they are pretty damn sweet to me .

SWEET LIFE FIGHTING!!!!

Our maknae became a MAN

He's the reason why i'm became angsty sometime . Maknae yah! . Sengichukahamnida . Saranghae!! .

happy birthday my strong baby seungri yah!!! . you are my first bias and always be my bias . heart u like lots lots lots of time . Victory Fighting!!!! . Hope you enjoy your cake, panda . hahaha XD

vita dolce moderato

aaaaa!!!!! it's still not too late . yeorobun,, today i'm announcing my new name for the blog . (well, i cant change the ID but i can change the name though haha XD ) . so my new name for the blog is " vita dolce moderato " . which means " sweet life moderate " . the name was inspired by my man, G-Dragon from Bigbang . it was tattooed on his arm around 2007 in Las Vegas by a famous tattoo shop Hart & Huntington by Pink's ex-hubby, Carey Hart . so, what do you think guys?

ugly betty - poncho days are over!!

last night i watch an episode in 'Ugly Betty Season 4' . in this episode,, Betty had won an award for bloggers ( because Betty now is a famous erm,, not-so-famous-kind-of famous blogger,, hahah) . she inspired people to wrote positive thing on blog because she was always positive in her life . that good for you,, Betty . but then, something happened and she was really mad by her boss, Daniel, because he somehow has hurt her feelings . Betty then tried to be honest to her readers and told her readers about how much Daniel has hurt her feelings . not later, her blog had so many hits and Daniel accidentally read about Betty's article . of course, that guy was hurt too . they had a fight and their friendship had shaken a little bit . but in the end, they both got back together .

you know its a good thing that you have a place where u can express your feelings . say what you want . where people can hear your voice and what you really want to say . inspire other people . to thought about that,, i really want to be like that . a good and positive blogger . i can do it right?? . haha ,, i hope so . how about we all do the best in our blog?? . show other people a new perspective . change the mind of other people . how about that? . ok,, then lets fighting! . aja aja fighting! .

p/s : i cant wait for Betty and Daniel to start falling in love . BTW , Betty is still wearing that awful braces but her style are better than the "Poncho Days" . hehe XDD

the name sucks!

gahh~~ i tried to change my blog few times already . because i'm so boring with that ridiculous ID,,, 'janganblog' . seriously, do you guys think that name is stupid? . Kind of dorky?? . I think that name is stupid . I wasn't thinking when i created it . Come on,, my blog,, this blog has been around like for 4 years . that time i was a nerd . so i thought that that name is something that no one can copy because its sound BIZARRE . totally . but now i felt like that name is so LAMEE.... what the hell was i thinking?? . gosh! . and now i can't change it back unless i create a new blog which is way out of my will . i'm so damn tired . been stuck in front of my laptop for 3 hours just to change that ID back,, AND I JUST CANT!! . if only i'm the one who invent this stupid blogger i will change the settings so that it will be convenient for stupid people like me to change that stupid ID back!

Cerita lelaki yang hensem dan lelaki yang tak hensem

I came across this page on FB. Tajuk page tu "Kami Pelik Lelaki Tak Hensem Dapat Awek Superb". Well, this is a very interesting topic to discuss. Ok, why? Kenapa jadi macam ni? Sometimes aku nampak girlfriend dia punya la cun tapi sekali tengok boyfriend dia terfikir dekat otak aku "Hebatnya mamat tuh". Yes! Ini yang aku fikir setiap kali aku jumpa couple girlfriend cun boyfriend tak berapa nak cun. Why I think like that? Because mesti ada something yang special yang membuatkan girlfriend die boleh jatuh cinta dengan boyfriend yang tak hensem nih. Maybe sifat lelaki tu ke yang baik or penyayang or something yang perempuan tu nak ade pada boyfriend die yang tak hensem tapi tak ade pada mane-mane lelaki yang hensem dekat luar sana. DIFFERENT PEOPLE DIFFERENT TASTE.

Kadang-kadang pulak aku keluar dengan member-member and aku tengok ade pulak couple yang boyfriend die hensem tapi girlfriend die pulak tak lawa. Ini ape cerita? Setiap kali kalau aku nampak couple macam ni dekat mana-mana first thing yang aku fikir "Hensem giler boyfriend die". Hahaha sumpah aku jealous! Siapa tak nak boyfriend hensem kan? Sama jugak siapa tak nak awek cun betul tak? Perempuan ni sifat memilih sama je macam lelaki. Lelaki nak yang cantik so adil lah perempuan pulak nak yang hensem. But there's second thing that came to my mind was "Untung perempuan tu. Macam mana agaknye die boleh dapat boyfriend hensem?". So why? Maybe same jugak macam couple tadi yang boyfriend tak hensem tu perempuan tadi ni jugak maybe has something that what pretty ladies don't have.

Maybe la boyfriend yang hensem tu muka je hensem tapi perangai pun tak lah hensem mana. So dapat la pulak awek yang tak berapa nak cun. Kira sesuailah memandangkan perangai die tak berape nak hensem jugak. Or maybe awek yang cun tadi pun perangai pun suam-suam kuku je so padanla boyfriend die tak hensem. Maybe boyfreind and girlfreind yang tak hensem tadi perangai pun teruk tapi telah ditakdirkan oleh Tuhan dapat girlfriend yang cun and boyfriend yang hensem dengan perangai yang baik untuk ubah diorang ke arah kebaikan. Who knows? Anything can happen. LIFE IS FULL OF SUPRISES.

Kalau aku bagi contoh la animals for example. Kalau singa betina nak mengawan die akan mengawan dengan singa jantan yang menang dalam perlawanan. Singa yang paling gagah and paling kuat la yang dapat mengawan untuk satu-satu musim tu. Singa yang kalah ni tak dapat lah den nak tolong kan. Terpaksa la cari lain. But different pulak dengan penguin. Bila musim mengawan penguin betina akan mengawan dengan penguin yang dapat kutip batu yang paling baik untuk dihadiahkan kepada penguin betina. Batu yang dibawa oleh penguin jantan inilah yang digunakan untuk memikat penguin betina. Bayangkan dekat artik ade batu ke? So terpaksa la penguin jantan ni berjalan terkedek-kedek berbatu jauhnya setakat nak cari sekecil batu. Takkan la nak bawak batu konkrit pulak kan penguin je kot. Batu yang terbaik je la yang akan dipilih oleh penguin betina ni. Tak kisah la macam mana pun rupa penguin jantan tu. And kalau nak tahu penguin hanya mengawan dengan satu sahaja pasangannya untuk seumur hidup. Plus, penguin jantan lah yang akan mengeram telur-telur dan menjaga anak-anaknya while penguin betina keluar mencari makanan. Tak Ada Poligami Ada Kompromi ;)). I likeee..

So what I meant is everything is a PREPARATION! Attitude is what matters. Doesn't matter how you look as long as you are good at heart. Bukan ke lelaki yang baik hanya untuk perempuan yang baik. Tak ada pulak hadis sebut lelaki yang hensem hanya untuk perempuan yang cantik. Kalau muka je hensem lawa tapi perangai hodoh tak gune jugak. Kalau difikir-fikirkan kan? This is all part of the nature rule. Kalau lelaki yang hensem hanya untuk perempuan yang cantik, macam mana pulak dengan yang tak hensem dan yang tak cantik tu? Tak adil la kan. Dunia ini bulat. Belah lah macam mana pun still dapat angle yang sama. Adil kan?

So I wrote on that page "Cinta itu buta. Lelaki hensem perangai hensem is powerful. Lelaki hensem perangai tak hensem is a waste. Lelaki tak hensem perangai hensem is wonderful. Lelaki tak hensem perangai pun tak hensem is a shame". Well that goes to the ladies too. Aku pernah kenal lelaki yang hensem dan lelaki yang tak hensem. I believe there's not much difference between them. Tapi ak pernah kenal lelaki yang pernah lukakan hati aku dan what he did to me is strictly because of his jerk attitude. I don't even care how he look but what he did reminds me that sometimes what you see is not what you get. Kita boleh tipu luaran kita tapi kita tak kan dapat tipu diri sendiri.

Orang yang cantik dan hensem tak semestinya baik dan perfect. Dan orang yang tak cantik dan tak hensem tak semestinya tak baik semuanya. Nobody is perfect. And I believe 200% to this saying "BEAUTY IS IN THE EYE OF THE BEHOLDER".

Credit to the page "Kami Pelik Lelaki Tak Hensem Dapat Awek Superb" for coming out with such a great piece that made me think a little bit ;)

kalau lah dapat mamat ni memang best! Hehe tapi kalau tak dapat pun tak apa ;))

my reading habit - is a fairytale story

i was searching some website on the internet . then i ran through this website about books,, and i suddenly realized that i haven't read books for so long! . i used to read books and novels . i even have collection of books at my home where i used to read whenever i had spare time . and i used to buy books . my hobby before was reading (still remember when i was in form 4 - and my friends asked me to write a biography - and i wrote my hobby there - READING) until i went to matric and then started busy with studies . no longer books authored by Nicholas Sparks or Sophie Kinsella or Sidney Shieldon . only lecture notes by En. Hisham,, Pn. Fazilah and Pn. Azimah (all of them was my 2nd sem lectures- i forgot names of my 1st sem lectures- hahaha ;p) which i got stuck with it everyday .

and now even after matric,, which i have so much time (so much time - for taking bath almost 1 hour huhu) i didn't even get back to my reading hobby . why??? . now i'm thinking about all the reasons why i don't use to read anymore ........ . ..................

hurmmmm,,, well the first reason came to my mind was money . since i'm practically broke (which some people supposed to have a little bit mercy on me - especially the one who is capable to take care of my expenses - my sister) i can't buy books anymore . what kind of books i can buy with just enough money to top up for a week?? . NONE . so lastly i didn't buy books and my hobby seems to be perished .

but then again,, i thought of another reason why i didn't read books anymore,, is because of the so-called-next-big-thing (which you already know) - Facebook . yeah,, i think because of FACEBOOK i didn't read books anymore . why?? . why not? . it's has been a dutiful task everyday for me to check out my FB . it has become an addiction for me - yeah i am a FB addict . (bapak giler sokong yahudi ak nih! - astaghfirullahalazim) .

fuh! . i need to go to rehab . someone! . try to get me to rehab now! . and maybe a reading class . huhuhu . i am such a crazy girl with so much issue . hahahahah XD

haha . i guess that's the effect of long time loneliness disorder . i'm a FB addict . i don't read anymore . i care less . i talks too much . i thinks very little . i don't date anyone right now . i'm single . haha . if you like me you better hurry ;))

currently thinking about the best way to update my pages on FB . huhuhu

realised that i'm still a girl in school uniform

ooowh SAD ;'( . still didn't have the chance to watch prince of persia . i've been waiting that movie for so long . wish i have someone to watch it with me . anyone?? . hehe . parah dah ak nih ;) .

yup! . i think i'm goin a lil bit crazy . alone all by myself . tade org nk kat ak ke? . tadela kot . huhu terpaksela bersendirian . i like being single as long as i have something to do . not like now . sitting at home alone . doing nothing . i woke up late everyday . taking bath too long . doing so much laundry . cleaning the house . watching tv all day . at nite online FB for hours long . sleep early in the morning . then everything happen all over again the next day . than sitting at home,, i rather go back to matric . i don't care about the exhaustion or classes or assignments as long as i do something . seriously .

or maybe considering to go back to high school . damn . i miss high school so much . the life there is so fun and memorable . my sweet 16, my senior year, my junior year . i can say that my best moment happened in school . where i learned how to step out in this world . i learned everything there . wish i can go back and able to make miracles again . Methodist Girl School Klang the best placed i've ever been ! .

owh,, miss my school days . for those who still studying in school especially to all juniors in MGS . treasure every moment in school . because you'll miss it . and you'll never get back to school to those years where you grow up with loving teachers and friends .

currently my mind and my soul was taken back to my school ;p . goodnite everyone .

Aku bukan Seksis

sombong?? tak tahula kenape org yg ak tak kenala selalu cakap ak ni sombong . especially org yg nk knal ak kat FB (bodo punye YAHUDI!) . kepada yg bace and rasa2 mcm " terase " tuh . cuba kau pikir la pakai akal yang di anugerahkan . kau tak kenal ak then kau add ak . ok ak approve . then kau chat kat ak anta smiley la hye la . ak tak balas . ok dah la senyap je lepas tu tak boleh ke? . kau tak puas hati ak tak reply dah tu tiba2 kau ckp ak sombong . kau kenal ak pun tak,, ape hak kau nk ckp ak cmtu?? . ak tak fhm btul la . then bile ak tanye kau nak maki2 ak . tu yang mulut ak ni nk jadi jahat tau tak . sape tak hangin . tiba2 je nk kata ak ni mcm2 . ada mcm sorg budak nih . mule2 ak ok je reply sume hye die . then bile ak ckp ak tak knal die trus nk maki2 ak . ckp ak ni muke cam babi la perasan cantik la . F word sume keluar . apehal weh??

yg kau mara ak pasal ak tak kenal kau tu apehal? . dah memang ak tak kenal . kau ingat ak ni scanner kat database polis ke leh knal sume org . lain la kalau kau tu pembunuh ke perogol ke . so nk sembur2 ak sesedap mulut kau je apesal? . ak tak paham la dgn sesetengah org laki zaman skrg ni yg desperate tahap otak letak kat lutut nk mara org sesuka hati je . tolongla weh . jadi laki tu jgn jadi loser boleh tak? . awak ade 9 akal gune la . ak bukan seksis nk menghina sume laki . sesetengah laki yg tak berkualiti kat luar sne tu lah yang membuatkan laki yg baik2 kat malaysia sume menjadi mangsa .

klu ak dah tak minat nk knal kau tak yah la nk bhse2 kan ak mcm2 . carik la perempuan lain kat lua sne yg melambak2 kat lua . zaman skrg ni 1 lelaki nisbah 10 perempuan . again,, pikir la sendiri . buat ape nk buang masa and air liur kat sorg pmpuan mcm ak ni sedangkan kau ade 9 lagi pilihan lain . jgn jadi pak kaduk dlm keadaan mcm ni .

klu sorg dua ke yg buat mcm tu ak tak kisah la . mslhnye hampir kebanyakan yg add ak sume ade masalah yg sme . ak spesifik kan pd lelaki je la . sbb tade perempuan gile yg add ak . klu dah selalu mne boleh tahan . klu sepuluh org maki ak,, takan sepuluh2 org tu ak nk diamkan je . ade dah pn bdk2 yg ak da delete and block trus . lantak kau la . naseb baik ak tak saman kau . ingat zaman skrg ni leh suke2 je nk hina org cmtu . negara ade undang2 ok . tak puas ati jom gi court . bru tau sape betul sape salah .

ak bukan nk mara sgt . tapi ak nk bagitau la ape yg kau buat kat ak tu tak patut la sampai mcm tu . ape la sgt klu ak tak reply ke,, tak layan kau ke,, tak knal kau ke,, tak payah la sampai nk merendahkan martabat org laki and org perempuan . tak payah la nk judge ak kata ak sombong la sedangkan kau tak knal pn ak . patut ke klu ak tak knal kau and ak ckp kau sombong la apela . kau sendiri pn tak nak kn . so paham2 je la . this is a win-win situation ok . klu rasa ak tak nak layan kau,, kau tak yah la kesah psl ak . kau pn tak rugi ape . ak lagi bahagie .
in the end,, post ni bukan nk menghina sape2 sbb hakikatnye kat cni ak yang telah di hina oleh org2 yg tak sepatutnya . so tade sebab org2 yg tidak berkaitan nk rasa mara psl post ni . ak tak salahkan kaum lelaki ok . ak juz "underestimate" lelaki2 yang tidak tahu menggunakan kelebihan yang ada sebagai seorang lelaki . kerana di tangan lelaki lah terletaknya harga diri seorang perempuan . BECAUSE A REAL MAN KNOWS A REAL WOMAN'S WORTH . and for those man who knows his woman's worth,, andalah lelaki yang akan menjadi penghulu syurga yang kekal abadi .

You and I - We need money$$$

i am single again . urgh ;( . not happy about it . it's so boring being a single . damn boring . Okay,, i know i used to say " Single is the BEST Damn Thing " . it's true . single is the best damn thing . but it's not the best thing when you are bored . for a person like me,, BORING is the only thing that bugs me a lot . because i have nothing to do . my school is over . i didn't have a job . i'm sitting at home alone . GLUED to my laptop and tv . i am practically broke! . i don't have money . what else can i do??! . someone have to quite me down before i scream to my laptop . hehe ;p

holiday? it's the first thing that came to my mind . unfortunately i'm poor . not a rich person . shopping? haha ;p it wont be a bad idea if i had money just to top up my phone credit . what else.... leisure? again . i am unbelievably extremely very poor . so the key to my ri-donkey-lous unsolved case is MONEY .

GAWD, it's scare the shit out of me . how am i gonna live in this world? . MONEY . Everybody needs money . i need money . " Money can't buy happiness " . Owh ,, Hell No! . Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping . what a douche-bag! . people kill for money these days okay ? . live to the fact . if you can buy a big house,, a dream house where you can live happily with your family,, isn't it worth it? . isn't money is the way to get everything you want?? .

ermm,, i had a twist while i wrote just now . lets say you bought a house,, your dream house . you and your family live there happily . you have big cars with a butler . you have a golf course at your backyard and you wear a Jimmy Choo's . and you are happy . my question is did you bought happiness or you bought things that makes you happy? . i think we all bought things that make us happy isn't it . so we didn't actually buy happiness . we use money as a tool to have happiness . now we're clear .

yes . i may wrong a little . but hey,, in the nutshell,, money still can brings you wonders of life . especially in marriage . a stable and happy marriage is a marriage that can go through any commitment in future . and believe this saying,, when you have 3 kids, a house loan , car debts, piles of bills and tons of taxes,, money is your only commitment . omg,, only by seeing my soon-to-be-married-yet-to-have-a-family sister have sent chills down my spine . how can i have a family?? . that is just me . now imagine millions of people . soon,, we all just clone ourselves and will not produce anymore . woosh!

that is why people become materialistics nowadays . you can't blame me for being materialistics (i like things but i'm not materialistics - for now - erm,, i still think that i am not materialistics) . look at the paychecks todays,, even undergraduates hardly can survive a month with 4k salary . living cost is too high! we've become crazy about bills, taxes, clothes, food, expenses, lifestyle- MONEY . we cried when we announced our bankruptcy,, we yelled when our stock market crashed,, we shouted when oil price rocketed,, we jumped when the governments claimed malaysia holds the highest increased of budget deficit of 5% for over the 20 years (what is that? - well,, i can tell you - it doesn't sound good to me) . we have UN (PBB), UNICEF, UNESCO . now we should have MOMOWO - Money Monkey World Organisation .

a farmer makes 80k profit from breeding catfish . that's 20 times more than a doctor get a month salary . a beggar makes rm 200 - rm 300 a day on a street more than a lawyer could make a day-everywhere! . it's crazy! . the world have gone crazy! . errr,, should we all become beggars ????

A " Do Over "

I used to write happy stuff that happens in my life in this blog . its been a year since i wrote in this blog . and i didn't write anything during that time . because my life is nothing . 2009 is just a chapter of my life that i almost practically,, lived " in the BOX " . i started blogging in year 2007 . where at that time all good things happened in my life . but all good things came to an end . after i broke up i don't have anything to say in this blog . my ideas are all gone . just some stray thoughts out of nowhere . i don't have the desire to share things anymore . i was a blogger . most blogger like to post everything about their life and feelings . but i didn't do that for a year . because some things are just too personal for me to share it with everyone . i lived in a pathetic conditions where things are just too complicated . i had a handle on my life before,, but it broke . i was sad . i was not in a good shape . i was completely clueless and miserable . the darkest age of my life . i am tired of faking " I am happy, everyone " and put on a smile face .

i really want to get over things . i wanted to leave everything behind and " Do Over " again . Life is a " Do Over " for me . i did it once . and i want to do it again . this time is me getting back up again . i am tired of finding happiness that never comes,, love that eventually breaking me apart . i am tired of people's expectations on me,, all their hopes on me . i am tired of my life before . i am tired to the point where i want to run away from everything .

i have so many things in my mind right now . wishing if i could just put a FULL STOP